Do’s and Don'ts: Wedding Guest Etiquette + Advice for Couples
Believe it or not, there is much more to attending a wedding than dressing up, and partying the night away. Read our pro tips on how to be the best guest this wedding season.
DO RSVP before the deadline. It is a lot of work to plan a wedding! Whether you are able to attend or not, send that invitation back to help the couple so they can continue to get a final headcount for caterers and seating charts. Advice for couples: request your RSVP’s back at least 30 days prior to the wedding, so you have enough time to work on the seating charts and finalize meals for your guests.
DON’T assume you can bring a plus-one. Read the invitation carefully, unless it states, “and guest,” please don’t assume you can bring a plus-one. Weddings are expensive and usually 100% planned for, sometimes down to the last seat. In most cases, couples would love to extend an invitation but numbers don’t allow for it. Advice for couples: make sure to keep an excell spreadsheet with your guest count to make it easier follow up with stragglers as well as keep track of your RSVP’s.
DO mail your gift if you can. Keep the bride and groom from having to haul dozens of gifts to the newlywed suite, go postal. Most stores do have a shipping option, if not, ask the couple for their address. Trust me, they will be grateful for the doorstep delivery. Advice for couples: make sure to update your registry on your wedding website, so your guests don’t have to guess what gifts you’d like to receive on your wedding day.
DON’T record the ceremony or even take pictures during it. Unless you have gotten specific instructions from the couple to capture the big moment, hang up and hang out. Couples hire a photographer and videographer to capture the entire day so the guests can relax and enjoy their time celebrating not through a camera lens. Advice for couples: invest at least 10% of your overall wedding budget in your photographer, lots of wedding details will be forgotten years later but the pictures of your loved ones and you will be treasured for years to come as a beautiful memory.
DO party it up! The bride and groom want their guests to have a good time. They want you to occupy the dance floor, mingle with friends, and enjoy the reception they have just worked so hard to plan. Advice for couples: make sure to research and read the reviews from the previous clients on the band/DJ music style, so that it aligns with the music style you love!
DON’T be late. Time and time again I have seen guests show up as the wedding party has already made their way down the aisle. Don’t ruin the bride's entrance trying to slip in the back. A good rule to stick by, arrive 30 minutes before the ceremony begins. Advice for couples: offer a signature drink, champagne, or some appetizers for guests who arrive 30 minutes before the ceremony, so they don’t get hungry while waiting for the ceremony.
There are so many “unwritten rules” in the wedding planning process, but I think the most important one is to be fully present and enjoy the day, because it goes by so quickly!
Photo by Christi Clark